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That's it! You're going to bed RIGHT NOW.

Within the 30 minutes between my husband calling me and saying he's coming home from work to when he got home things went down.

What I mean is for some reason my almost 4 year old decided he wanted to test every fiber of my being.

You know the feeling when you are standing in the kitchen making dinner and everything just seems way too easy? In other words there are no toddlers or preschoolers yelling, crying, tattling, or shooting you in the back with a nerf bow and arrow. It is silent. Except the sound of my chopping onions. It's almost too good to be true. Well, not almost-  it is too good to be true.

I hold on to hope for a minute or two trying to convince myself they are quietly looking at books and playing nicely with legos somewhere over the rainbow, but I know in order to be a decent mother I must go investigate the eerie silence we know all too well.

There they are sitting next to each other in our bed and as they see me enter the room, the guilty 2 and almost 4 year old quickly throw the covers over the loot.

"What's under there?"

"A game...mommy we are playing glasses!" My almost 4 year old throws back the covers smiles and shows me all our sunglasses and our eye glasses. Trying to be a patient, good mom, although I know the oldest knows better than to play with these (so more in hopes they continue playing this some what illegal game so I can cook dinner in peace) I show them which cheap sunglasses they could play with and which expensive (eyeglasses I am required to wear to drive anywhere) are completely off limits.

I then go on my merry way congratulating myself on a parenting job well done. Well the eerie silence continues. And I know they can't be having that much fun with one pair of sunglasses between the two of them. I mean come on there at least would be a fight over who gets them.

So off down the long walk I go.

Not only do I see a stool at the base of my dresser right below where I put the forbidden glasses, but I also notice my purse missing. This time I whip open the covers and discover the forbidden glasses as well as my 2 year old going through my purse which was obviously retrieved by a very resourceful almost 4 year old ring leader.

I try to stay calm. I hang with desperation to my love and logic roots and say how sad and bummer and stuff and then send them both to their rooms for time outs until daddy gets home. (Which by now is like 5 minutes away)...

Well off I go to continue attempting dinner only to hear giggling and door slamming. I discover them playing together in the almost 4 year old's room.

Mommy's mad.

I tell my almost 4 year old, "When I tell you not to play with my things I'm not joking. When I say you are in time out it's not a joke." My mind is racing trying to figure out what to do to make an impact on this seemingly unaffected and resourceful kid all the while thinking it's time to take the chicken off the BBQ.

Then comes the retort - "Mommy you are joking. It's all a joke. I'm laughing."

I can't even believe it. I really can't. I don't know why and perhaps you are in disbelief right now too, but this comment is far too much. And really witty for an almost 4 year old.
I announce his sentence- straight to bed with no dinner. It is 6:15 pm.

(he did eat two quesadillas and an apple at 5:30 pm so it's not like I'm starving the kid)

All of a sudden he's sorry and so hungry. And sobbing in his room. The two year old is crying too and I have no idea why, probably because being naughty with her brother was more fun, but oh well here comes the party pooper- I mean mom.

Have you ever felt so angry at your kid's actions you were shaking in anger?

Well I spent most of the night shaking with anger and disbelief on how the events of the night transpired. Then I began to feel guilty and like I was too harsh. My husband completely backed me up and also went in his room to hug him goodnight. Geeze I am such the bad guy. Well by the end of the night, my guilt overtook my anger and I went in his room and hugged him. I let him "read" me a story he's memorized and then cuddled with him for a bit.

"I'm really sorry mommy for what happened earlier."

"I know honey, I love you."

After closing the door. I didn't know if I should have done that. Maybe I should have been a complete hard ass and left him until the next day. But somehow that just seemed right. I hope I am doing the right thing. I don't know how things went down hill so fast. And all about the time I needed to get that chicken off the BBQ.


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