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Love and Logic UH OH HOW SAD

Here's the nitty gritty break down on the old L&L. 

First some background: Before I left life as I knew it, or in other words became a mom, I was trained in good old love and logic. I came to work dressed professionally, met with my collegues and talked through all the different scenarios we could use love and logic techniques with the students we worked with. 

Students I might add who were "at risk" in other words expelled, on probation,in gangs, using drugs..etc. Love and Logic worked miraculously with these guys. I mean really. AMAZING. 

So...When I saw there was Love and Logic for parents. Let alone for EARLY CHILDHOOD! I thought this is for me! I am already so amazing at it that using Love and Logic on my 3 year old son and 15 month old daughter will be a BREEZE. 

Well it's not. This parenting book is not for half ass parenting. Love and Logic does work. Really well. The key is being consistent. 

Now for me I had no problem not yelling at teens at work. I did not get hot and flustered and take things personally when they cussed me out. I could go home to peace and quiet and my yellow labrador and the end of the day and come back refreshed and ready to love and logic all over the place. 

When you are using love and logic with your little ones. Well...lets just say I have yelled. (You're not supposed to do that in the book). They haven't cussed me out yet but my son does know how to use "dammit" correctly..but that's for another day. 

 Ok back to the review. Overall, the book works. The idea that you give kids choices so that they perceive they have control is great. It works. 

Thinking of consequences related to the actions is difficult. You have to get creative. No more reverting to time outs and spankings? for everything. 

The enforceable statements are fun. Don't say anything you can't back up. Here's my experience with this one. 

Hey son -feel free to keep the toys you pick up! (Feeling pretty proud of my L&L self). I proceed to have to clean up all his toys. He  loses them. 

Suddenly he looks at me and grabs his sister's new toy. 

"Hey mommy! I picked this toy up! I get to keep it!" Umm..... 

Overall the enforceable statements are awesome though. Like, "I charge money every time you scream in the car."

Love and Logic is also all about locking in the empathy. My buzz word "How Sad". When I say this, seriously everything stops. And when I actually started parenting my daughter I said it to her and my son was shocked and asked WHAT DID SHE DO??!! 

Overall- This is what I would do if I were you. Get the book from the library. Borrow it from a friend. It's hard to find. Read the love and logic experiments at the end of each chapter. That's all you have to do to get the gist of if it's right for you. Oh yeah... personally I think some of the thinking is a little black and white. So I used what I like for my family and ignored what I didn't want to do. Because I'm the mom. 

So do you want to read it now? Or in five minutes? 


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